Parenting – CREDO CXVI

 
I learned some interesting techniques that my mother taught me and even more from my own children as parents. I think they are worth sharing with others.

• When I had a two-year-old tantrum, my mother would simply drag me in front of a full-length mirror and hold me there. Eventually my fury would turn to giggles and the tantrum was over!

• When I dawdled about getting ready to leave, she would taunt me saying, “Of course, you can’t pack your own suitcase, etc.” I showed her!

• When she thought I would enjoy a book, I would usually demur, so she would hide it and let me discover it.

• When I was six in Paris, I was impossible. Mother would stop and ask, “Now, if you were the mother and had a child like yourself, how would you handle her?” Immediately, I would be intrigued and stop and give her an extremely sensible solution! (I found this account in a letter she wrote to my uncle!)


From my son and daughter, I learned how to take a lifetime of guilt complexes placed on so many children who are told how naughty or bad they are. Switching to a neutral position, one simply says:

• That’s a no! Or if they want to do something inappropriate,

• That’s not going to happen.

• Praise and recognition of achievement. For the very wee ones, just clap hands! They usually join in.

• Oops! is a very convenient expression . . .

lovingly,
ao